It seems that whenever I present a keynote on self-care or mention self-care in a webinar, someone in the audience asks, “but what if you can’t practice self-care”? In the beginning I was perplexed by this comment and asked, “what do you mean, you can’t”? I was then presented with a barrage of reasons that included “my days are too long”, “my work culture doesn’t support it”, “I have too many other responsibilities”, or “it just isn’t possible”.

Well, I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t matter if you work a 16-hour shifts, have children and pets to care for, or a commute that is longer than an episode of Game of Thrones, self-care is a non-negotiable activity that must be incorporated into your routine. While it might not be an epic 90-minute exercise class or a full 8-hours of sleep, there are ways to incorporate self-care into your week in order to build up your reserves and maintain your caregiving capacity over those long stretches of work.

Here are the 5 most common impediments to self-care and ways to overcome them:

1) Using busyness as a badge of honor

I can hardly remember a time when I asked someone “how are you” and didn’t get the response “busy!”. And it’s no wonder with full calendars, umpteen obligations, and technology sucking up your spare moments that you might feel as though “there simply isn’t time for self-care”. I urge you to really look at what you’re spending your time doing and ask yourself what you could let go of. If something isn’t promoting your health and wellbeing or is not fueling your passions and it isn’t a necessity, could you consider saying no to allow time for self-care activities. For example, I’ve learned to limit my social engagements each week to avoid “over-scheduling” myself, recognizing that if I show up depleted and exhausted that those gatherings won’t be enjoyable anyways.

2) Lack of prioritization

For some of you who complain about not having time for self-care I wonder how much time you’re spending on your phone or watching TV / streaming services. While these activities are sometimes relaxing and can serve as coping strategies during times of exhaustion when you don’t have energy for health-promoting activities, they do not function as self-care. So, if you’ve never monitored your social media use, I urge you to give it a try. Applications such as StayFree, Quality Time, and My Phone Time can be downloaded to Android devices to give you a sense of how many hours you spend on social media and other apps. For those who have an iPhone, Screen Time is included in the iOS and can send daily or weekly notifications of phone usage. Some of these functions will even shut off apps and force you to override them if you wish to continue using them. Freeing up 20-30 minutes per day could allow you to go outside for a walk, fit in a HIIT workout, phone a friend, or sit in meditation, all of which serve to boost your mental health and wellbeing.

3) Low self-worth

For many veterinary professionals, it’s not so much a lack of time that prevent self-care, but rather, a lack of deservedness. In other words, you may concentrate on the needs of others as a means of validation or feel that your needs are somehow less important. The late Diana, Princess of Wales once said, “Everyone of us needs to show how much we care for each other and, in the process, care for ourselves”.  In my experience, self-care is often a reflection of a person’s self-esteem, self-respect, and self-worth in that it requires acceptance of the fact that we must first look after ourselves in order to meet the needs of those we care for. As caregivers in the veterinary profession, it is especially important to recognize that we require self-care first and foremost before offering our services to our clients, patients, and co-workers.

4) Lack of appropriate planning

Sometimes we make vague statements like “I’ll go to the gym more” or “I will meditate more regularly” but without a specific plan or goal. In the words of Gretchen Rubin, “something that can be done at any time is often done at no time”. Once you identify a self-care activity that will promote your health and wellbeing, then it’s important to put a specific plan in place or set a SMART goal, so that you can readily achieve it. For example, perhaps you will wake up 30-minutes earlier to fit in a quick workout in the morning (my favorite free home workouts are from Fitness Blender) or you will aim to meditate for 10-minutes every night before bedtime using a recording (Insight Timer and Calm are my favorite apps). The more specific and scheduled you can make your self-care plan the more likely it is to happen. And know that 10-minutes is better than nothing, so if you have a long shift or out-of-work obligations, set yourself up for success by committing to something you know you’ll have the time or energy for.

5) Unhealthy boundaries

Most veterinary professionals are also people-pleasers, which can lead to unhealthy boundaries that cater only to the demands or needs of others. Healthy boundaries mean recognizing your limits, communicating your needs clearly, and adhering to the non-negotiables in your life. I know that for me to do the work that I do, I need a certain amount of sleep, meditation in the morning, movement every day, and time for connection with others. These needs help me to identify boundaries that will ensure that these activities can be allotted into my day. While long work shifts (>12 hours) can diminish my time for health-promoting activities, having boundaries ensures that there will be at least some work-life separation that allows me to practice self-care.